God Is Always There

So much to do, so little time. I feel like that’s my motto right now. I feel like I’m lost in this endless battle of time. When I finally have a minute to relax, the last thing I feel like doing is writing. I can’t even think of what to write about. Is it a case of writer’s block, holiday blues or just the regular stresses of life?

I don’t know about the rest of you, but this time of year always stresses me out. I enjoy giving gifts to others, although trying to find the perfect gift can be down right impossible. People can only have so many candles, lotion, blankets, shirts, and lip glosses given to them in one Christmas. And then on top of all the shopping, you have to wrap everything. But it’s not just the holidays that bring me down.

When I had Ryan a little over a year ago, I was always happy. Not much could dampen my spirits. Well, except when my hormones were going crazy after being pregnant. Overall though, things felt like they were positive. Now it seems that everything is difficult. I’m sure it’s just a phase I’m going through, but it sure makes it tough on the family.

When I was in my early twenties, people would always tell me that I was patient. Maybe that was because I chose teaching children as a profession, not because they actually saw me in action being patient. As the years went on, I could feel my patience decrease little by little. But these days, I don’t think I have a patient bone in my body. This has led to many fights with my husband. He gets so frustrated with my words and actions. I ask him to do something and if he doesn’t answer me right away, I tell him to forget it. I try to control myself and not get annoyed, but I can’t help myself. How can I live the rest of my life always snapping at everyone or being annoyed by them?

I need to turn to God. He is the only one I can turn to for help. He will be there to guide me in the right direction when I fail and to wipe the dirt off my knees when I fall. God is always there. I haven’t went to Him yet for my impatience problem. You know what they say, be careful what you pray. If you pray for patience, God will give you more situations to break you down, so He can build you up again. He will build you into an even better, stronger, and more loving person than you were before. And that’s what I hope for myself. It’s too hard to do life alone. So I choose to do it with Him. I hope you all can pray for me and that you too will look to God to help guide you in this crazy thing called life.