We mentioned a couple of weeks ago our privilege to attend a wonderful marriage conference being held at our church.  There were four sessions in all titled:

• When Sinners Say ‘I Do’ – Sin
• When Sinners Say ‘I Do’ – Mercy
• When Sinners Say ‘I Do” – Grace
• Parenting in Weakness

Actually, the fourth session was given on Sunday morning, but was offered as a follow-up to the marriage retreat.  We encourage you to make the time with your spouse to listen to these messages – they’re all FREE.  We are certain the truths shared by Dave Harvey will challenge you, encourage you, and most importantly change your marriage as you respond to the Lord.

Have a wonderful weekend!

I have put this blog off for 5 days now. I don’t want to write it because it brings back so many painful memories, but I know this is exactly what I should share. As a precursor, it is lengthy.

January 21, 2007, we were blessed to find out we were pregnant with #4.  We were so excited, scared, nervous, all the emotions that go along with having another child.  We knew though that God was in control and this was His will. 
Just 2 short weeks after the joy of being pregnant overwhelmed me, I started having problems.  I had started bleeding and the doctor confirmed that it was an impending miscarriage.  We were devastated.  Heartbroken doesn’t even begin to describe how we felt.  We knew though, that even in this God had a plan.  We didn’t and still don’t understand it, but it isn’t for us to know. 

We were in the healing process of losing a child, healing some areas in our marriage, and healing our spiritual lives.  I had truly grown closer to Chad and to God.  I was now staying at home, not working, and loved every minute of it.
Sunday, February 18, 2007, I was scheduled to sing with a trio that morning.  The song chosen was, “Gentle Healer”.  How appropriate to sing at church following the heartbreaking event of losing a child.  We also sang, “He Knows My Name”, another song that is very emotional even to this day.  We had chosen the name Josiah for our child if it were a boy, the literal translation of his name is, “Healer”.  (Do you see God in this anywhere?)  The guest speaker that spoke that morning talked about why some Christians are afraid of death.  This is an issue that I have dealt with for a long time.  I wasn’t scared to meet Jesus; I was scared of how my family would make it without me.

Monday, February 19, 2007 6:00 am, Cana woke me up because she wasn’t feeling well.  I got up with her and got her back in bed and laid down to get a few more minutes of sleep.  As I lay down, Chad woke from a sound sleep and asked me if I was feeling alright.  Confused by the question, I said, yes, why?  He had no explanation, he just felt like he needed to ask.  As I laid my head down my chest began to ache a little.  Thinking it may be some gas build-up, I decided to go to the bathroom.  As I was walking toward the bathroom, I felt really weird.  When I got to the toilet, I yelled for Chad and he came running.  A pain unlike any other I had ever felt now filled my entire abdomen through my chest.  As he knelt down beside me I told him I felt like I couldn’t breathe, felt like I was going to pass out, and was scared. Immediately, I passed out.  Chad laid me on the floor and called 911.  (From the time he asked me if I felt ok to this point, it was only about 3 minutes.)  I began throwing up and he couldn’t really get me to come to.  I told Chad, if I die; please take care of my babies.  I was at peace with dying that day, I was certain I was going home to be with the Lord.  Chad prayed and claimed in Jesus name my healing.  I was propped up against the bathtub as the ambulance arrived.  They were unable to get my blood pressure because they couldn’t hear it.  I was loaded in the ambulance on my way to Missouri Delta Medical Center in Sikeston.  In the ambulance, I tried to tell them to take me to Cape not Sikeston, but I was unable to speak.

 I arrived at the hospital and was rushed in.  Chad kept telling everyone I had just had a miscarriage, but I was sure it didn’t have anything to do with what was happening.  I was so weak I was unable to open my eyes.  My blood pressure was around 50/30 and I was going downhill fast.  Still, they didn’t know what was happening.  I went to have x-rays and they showed nothing.  While there though, I passed out again and began convulsing.  I was then moved to a different room to have a pelvic exam done.  Again I passed out and the doctor determined that my uterus was clear.  Then I was sent to ultrasound, there the tech found something he thought was a ruptured cyst.  A lot of fluid was in my abdomen.  Chad began to tell them that my ob doc was in Cape and he would like for me to be transferred there.  The hospital tried to contact him and found out that he was on vacation for the next two weeks.  The doctor told Chad there was no time to transfer me; he needed me to have emergency surgery and gave Chad two options for doctors.  He chose one and within 10 minutes she was there and I was being wheeled to the operating room.  Scared because I didn’t really know what was going on, but I knew God was totally in control.  When I came out of surgery, we were told that I had a ruptured tubal pregnancy and I was bleeding profusely into my belly, almost 2 liters.  My right tube and ovary had to be removed.  As the surgery began, I only had about 10 minutes left to live.  Reading over my story, the hand of God is seen all throughout.  I realized after my surgery, that God wasn’t finished with me.  He still has a plan and a purpose for my life. 

As tragic as this story is, there is good that has come from it. I have had the amazing opportunity to be in the hospital w/parents as their 10 day old baby lay dying and be a silent source of comfort for them. I never want to get tired of sharing our story with others. In the 3 years since losing the baby, we have been blessed with Jon Luke!

Even when things are grim and the light of day is nowhere to be found, God is still on the throne. Embrace Him today and allow Him to comfort you!

in the book of acts.. pentecost has come.. the comforter has landed and taken up residence in all who received Jesus Christ as their Lord and Savior.. by time we get to chpt 4.. “silver and gold i do not have.. but what i do have i give you..”..

a lame man is healed.. the crowd goes crazy.. but the “priests.. captain of the temple.. and sadducees” are not happy…. they come upon peter and john and take them into custody.. next day the host gather.. “rulers.. elders.. scribes.. high priest….  and as many as were of the family of the high priests gathered together”

all in one place.. all in one accord to question john and peter.. they don’t get it.. can’t see.. hear.. or don’t want to see.. or hear.. they are not happy about the teachings of peter and john… they want them to stop… read the story.. they can see and hear that these were “uneducated men.. untrained and yet they marveled..”

why…? what was it that got to them…? “seeing the man who had been healed they could say nothing against it”…

bble and i were talking tonight about men and women’s ministry.. i am continually amazed at the men who follow their show.. i was on a job site last wk and a man i know came up to me and asked me if bble was my wife…. “listen to their show every weekend”….

today on the girls radio show.. they were giving away free Bible studies to their upcoming Bible study on ephesians.. now this is a “women’s” Bible study.. by women.. for women.. can probably guess where i am going with this.. your right.. second caller.. ? a man… girls did not know what to say.. promoting their new upcoming Bible study by women.. for women  and a man calls to receive the gift.. wow…..

now… let me make something perfectly clear… the girls are right on track.. they teach the Word of God.. straight up.. right down the middle.. no compromise.. no tricky stuff.. pure to the core.. know their hearts.. can clearly measure the fruit in their lives.. any doubt.. just ck them out.. 1200 + women joined them on their 6th-annual conference.. truly a powerful work.. the power and the presence of the Holy Spirit flows in and through their lives.. their teaching and their ministry.. but why would a man.. why would men follow a women’s ministry…?

believe it’s the same reason the “host” had a problem with peter and john.. “power and presence”…  “bearing witness” that can only come from Above.. problem for us as men.. “no power..no presence”.. when it comes to “bearing witness”… we fall short.. we have clearly dropped the ball… the enemy has been eating our lunch since the days of adam and it’s not getting any better..

if you read on in the story… peter and paul are “severely threatened to not speak the name of Jesus”… peter and john’s response… ? “we cannot but speak the things which we have seen and heard”…

now think about it.. i mean as a man.. if pressed.. if “severely threatened”.. what we would our answer be..? if pressed.. what would we “bear witness” of…? “we cannot but speak the things which we have seen and hear”.. what would that be…?  many of us can quote sport data.. stocks and bonds.. current trends in our government.. world politics.. when it comes to the world.. if measured.. we are full.. and yet when it comes to our Lord.. our God.. our Savior.. you know the One who gave His life for us.. we can’t even remember what was taught at the last organizational meeting we attended.. and yes.. some are even in a men’s Bible study.. press in a bit.. you will hear all the goose-bump stories.. but knowledge.. Word.. presence.. power.. true repentance that requires change.. not much to be found.. we can be great at gathering.. but when it comes to real change.. “as a dog returns to his vomit we as men turn to our folly…”

if i am pounding it in.. you don’t hear the Love.. forgive me.. it’s there.. bble tells me that i need more love .. i need to soften my teachings.. my blogs..  can always use more love.. Lord’s been speaking to me.. remember 1 corinthians 13.. am trying.. stepping back and yes.. trying to give occasion for more love.. but have to admit.. not really interested in some soft spoken sweet talk’n teachings and/or candy coated blog.. been a man since the day the Lord breathed life into me.. some of it’s just not in me.. i am mad.. makes me sick to the core.. i look around.. i look in the mirror.. not happy with what i see.. i have been blowing it.. we are blowing it as men.. and it’s not getting any better…

believe as men our “bearing of witness” has been so washed out that we no longer know what it is to be a man.. just last wk had a man tell me that he believes the girls should start up a Bible study just for men.. wow.. is this what we have come to..?

“bearing witness”.. can you imagine paul.. david.. israel.. jacob.. peter going to a women’s Bible study… how is it the girls can “bear witness” and we as men can’t seem to get it together..? again.. if asked.. if pressed..  what would the answer be…? if measured.. exactly what is it we are “bearing witness” of…?

i so love my bble.. tl.. girl-team.. i am so proud of all that God is doing in and through their lives.. will stand with them.. fight for them.. take the hit.. work until i drop.. support them in every which way i can.. but i am a man who longs for men to get about our Fathers business..

men who will stand.. take account.. men “bearing witness” of our Lord.. our God our King.. you know He came as the Son of man… there were 12-disiciples.. the patriarchs were all men.. adam.. was a man.. the first of our kind..

if you read the gospels.. you will find that it was the women who stood with Jesus.. they did not stay indoors “hiding” because they were fearful of the people.. they were the last and first on the scene.. from the cross to the tomb they were the first to believe.. the men..? read the story.. you will figure it out..

truly i do get why men want to sit at the girls feet.. “power and presence”…. that comes from the Lord… from Above and let me say.. nothing wrong with men listening to the girls.. i listen to them.. i love them.. but we as men need to get about it.. and it won’t change until we get off our fhat complacent lazy butts.. and yes.. “more love”.. grace and mercy.. bble is right.. we need it…  but not as women.. as men.. by men.. to men.. only way it’s going to happen.. question for all of us is when..? what’s it going take..? if you take a few minutes and research men’s movements.. you will find that most fall.. doesn’t take long and we fall apart at the seams.. adultery.. fornication.. drugs.. greed.. you name it.. the entire host of hells stands against any man who wants to make a change in his life and/or the lives of men standing around him..

we need to unite.. hit the deck.. pound the Word into our lives and join together as one.. of one accord.. oh i pray for the day.. look forward to the day…. less that 1% of all men in the united states have successfully changed that way we look at men.. act as men.. do business as men… we are becoming a genderless society where there is no place for men to be men any more..

“we cannot but speak the things which we have seen and heard”… take a moment.. ask the question.. ask the Holy Spirit.. it’s your time.. our time as men to give occasion to our Lord so that we truly can.. will.. be “bearing witness” ……

stay in.. stay close.. hand to the plow…

tbrooks

Entering the auditorium for freshman orientation, the screen at the front of the room reads, “Welcome Class of 2014!”   The year is a little piece of trivia that I had stuffed away in the back of my mind years ago when I finally decided what year she was going to start Kindergarten and haven’t thought a lot of it since.  My first born has an Autumn birthday so it was up for debate, but in the end I decided to keep her home for a bonus year and it has proven to be an excellent decision.  Making that decision seems like a lifetime ago and yesterday all at the same time.  How is that possible?  I feel the knot of emotion tighten in my throat and steady myself.  I don’t want to be ‘that mom’ and it would be so easy to ‘get all emotional’ right now.

As we find our seats in the auditorium of the high school, I have that surreal feeling like I am living someone else’s life, because this one, I am certain, could not be mine, given my daughter is still, after all, just a little girl.  Isn’t she?  Yeah, I know…  not really.

Truthfully, over the years I have not given a lot of thought about the day she will graduate from high school.  She has always been fairly ‘easy’.  Nothing has ever really thrown me for a loop with her.  It’s just been an assumption that some day these high school days too would come.  Now, as I listen to the guidance counselor begin his ‘This is how much high school has changed since you were in it you old parents” spiel, those thoughts of the next four years, those mysterious school years that, like ‘Kindergarten’, are given special names and not just a number, have my heart beating just a little bit faster!  Not because I don’t think she is prepared or capable, on the contrary, I’m proud to say she is a far better student than I was in every way!  No, it is because this man giving his shtick keeps talking about how fast it will go.

I find myself thinking back to when I graduated from High School.  One of my favorite photos of that night is of my father and me.  We are standing together in the stadium, he in his navy blue sport coat and tie, a proud smile and misty eyes, and me, wearing my emerald green graduation robe and mortar board hat, my entire face beaming and in my hands a bag of confetti.  The moment seems like yesterday and then I am pulled back to reality.  The guidance counselor scrolls through his Power Point presentation and the photo in my mind transforms.  This time the picture is still of me, but now I’m the one beaming with pride and misty eyed, and the beaming graduate is now my lovely girl… and thanks to the image on the screen a new piece to the unknown puzzle comes in to view.  She’ll wear blue.

Class of 1990, my how time flies!

He’s called the king of the castle, lord of the manor, and even his favorite recliner is referred to as the “throne.”  Dads love to be king!  But, too many Dads fail to live up to their true calling in the family…the role of the Priest.

Through all my years of teaching many parenting classes, I have seen a troubling trend.  There seems to be more and more fathers who have checked out of their responsibility as priest to their family.  The father’s role is one of incredible importance.  In fact, biblically speaking, the word family comes from the root word meaning father.  The Greek word for family is “patria” and is derived from the root word “pater.” This is where we get the word paternal or paternity.

A priest represents his family to God.  He is the intercessor.  He sacrifices.  He leads by example.  He prays for his family and considers their well-being before his own.  He encourages them.  He gives the first fruits of his time, talents and resources to God and in turn, God blesses the remaining portions to share with his family.

Men, I want to challenge you to step up to your role as the priest or spiritual leader of your family.

• Pray for your family.
• Let them see you in prayer and quiet time.
• Lead family devotionals.
• Lead them in prayer.
• Lead them to church.
• Teach your family to serve.

Too often fathers vacate the role of priest and by default the mothers take over. This is not God’s order or pattern. Just as fathers cannot take the place of mothers, mothers cannot take the place of fathers. Fathers are to be the priests in the home.

Being the spiritual leader of your family builds trust and trust is the foundation of the relationship you will build with your children.  If they can’t trust you, it is impossible to have a close relationship with your children.

Men, you cannot be the crowned king until you’ve served as the priest. By assuming the role of priest, your family will be blessed.  God will honor your commitment and sacrifice and your children will grow up with a trust in their earthly father that leads them to a trust in their heavenly father.

As I’ve told y’all before, Bret and I don’t do much for Valentine’s day. I do think however, that the holiday can be a good reminder of God’s great love for us, and a great opportunity to show love to people around us.

I created a centerpiece to remind us of the love of God. The bottom part is some hearts, crocheted with yarn leftovers that I’ve had for quite a while. The rest of it is just stuff from around the house. Luke was interested in the sign and the flowers, so I used that as an opportunity to talk to him about God’s love for us, and the love we are to show to others.

A few years ago, I made heart cookies, and I did that again this year. I used the same recipe for the cookies, and this year, I had a sweet little helper!

Luke had so much fun dumping in ingredients and helping me stir the dough.

I did the rest of the baking and icing during naptime or after he was asleep at night. I had a bit of a fiasco with the icing. I used a recipe from Bakerella, and the icing turned out way too thick! I got a hand cramp trying to squeeze it out of the icing bag. Of course, it was a huge mess trying to return the icing to the bowl and thin it out a bit. I think I ended up adding a tablespoon more water than she calls for in the recipe. The icing ended up tasting really good, but in the future, if it looks to thick in the bowl, I’m going to thin it out before putting it in the icing bag.

Here are the cookies all bagged up and tied with tiny hearts I crocheted. We had a great time as a family taking these and delivering them to our friends.

This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins. Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another.
1 John 4:10-11

It is where two sinners come together and must learn how to deal with their sinfulness. Ultimately, they must arrive to two conclusions:

1. They will never be perfect for one another, and humans are in a constant state of flux and change. Their ugliness will be known to one another. They must settle for conflict and friction as they struggle to either give or receive as much pleasure as possible.

or…

2. They understand they can never be perfect for one another, nor were they intended to. A marriage is not reliant on how much pleasure or happiness it produces. Rather, it is relies on the promise of fidelity, life-long partnership, exclusivity, and selflessness. How beautiful and freeing this security!

How then, can we even approach such a thing, seeing we are changing, ugly, sinful creatures? Because we do not produce the model for marriage, but God has. Ultimately then, marriage is not merely about man and woman, but about God.

Greater yet, God not only defines marriage, but tells us how it works (understandably, given he created it). He would know what makes it work, and namely this is Him! Marriage, by its exclusive nature, necessitates selflessness, forgiveness, patience, kindness, compassion, etc. However these are things that don’t naturally occur in humans! If they did, we wouldn’t have things like divorce! Rather, with God in a marriage, we always have a perfect model for what marriage looks like!

God has every right to divorce mankind. We have broken the first commandment by placing ourselves as gods in our lives. We pursue pleasure for pleasures sake, because it makes us feel good. We are the lords of our lives, and we bring this into a marriage. However, God does not divorce humanity! Rather, he humiliates himself on the cross to show us the grandness and perfection of His love. He shows us how we are to be selfless and forgiving. Radically perfect love.

Because He showed this to us, namely in the form of the Cross, we can do this in a marriage (with His help). When God is part of a marriage, as it’s intended to be, partners can practice the selfless and forgiveness that they have witnessed AND experienced from the Almighty God! This is how God intended marriage, and how needed He is to make it work.

• “As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Abide in my love.” (John 15:9)
• “You therefore must be perfect, as your heavenly Father is perfect.” (Matt 5:48)
• “Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant” (1 Cor 13:4)
• Parable of the Unforgiving Servant, Matt 6:12

Psalm 24

 ¹The earth is the LORD’s, and the fulness thereof; the world, and they that dwell therein.

As I have said before, I am unabashedly a Christian. I’m also progressive in many ways. So I can’t get the “there’s no global warming because God is going to decide the end of the world anyway” mindset. Most especially because of the verse above.

The Lord placed life here on earth and gave us free reign over it. But make no mistake, this place is a sublet, not  a condo. It’s not ours to destroy while we’re here. How can anyone who claims a love of God trash his property? Yes, God decides when the earth is destroyed. But we are helping decide how it stays until he does so. We can’t destroy the earth. We CAN make it uninhabitable for life.

If we never check our carbon emissions, or recycle, or lived responsibly, the earth will still hang in the universe and rotate the sun. If the earth were bombarded with toxins and nuclear waste, it would still exist in the universe. But how would it be to live here?

So many “conservatives” seem to hate conservation. They claim to love the Lord God, but have so little regard for his creatures and spaces that they prefer the views of big polluters over Psalm 24. In their minds the earth is the corporations…. and the wastefulness thereof. Where is Christ in that thinking?

Christ, who loved nature so much that he used it time and again to prove his miracles and discuss in parables. The Lord literally lived outside. Come on people. It’s Jesus. If he was so pro-corporation, wouldn’t he have discussed these things?

Do Not Worry/ Matthew 6

 ²⁵“Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? ²⁶Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? ²⁷Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life^[b]?

 ²⁸“And why do you worry about clothes? See how the lilies of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. ²⁹Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. ³⁰If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith?

…

I find it remarkable that in that same chapter he takes to task those who are so in love with money. I mean you corporatists:

Treasures in Heaven

 ¹⁹“Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. ²⁰But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. ²¹For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.

 ²²“The eye is the lamp of the body. If your eyes are good, your whole body will be full of light. ²³But if your eyes are bad, your whole body will be full of darkness. If then the light within you is darkness, how great is that darkness!

 ²⁴“No one can serve two masters. Either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and Money.

The Lord is literally saying that it’s a choice here. You can’t serve as a Christian and be focused solely on money as the most important thing. So every time I hear some politician slash at nature, the very canvas on which the Lord created in favor of some plan to “aid business” or “create jobs”; I don’t see Christ. I see something else.

As the snows fell here in the Northeast, conservative pundits went on and on about how it disproved global warming. They were darn near gleeful about it!

Now, I’m no scientist. But I am a believer in Christ, so let me share this with the pundits. You cannot call yourself a friend of Christ and laugh about trashing his house so your buddies can make money. You don’t own the world. You’re just passing through it. Stop being so arrogant and get right with the Lord.

If you even knew him at all.

Christians should not worship creation. But if they respect who it belongs to they might be a little more careful about tidying up the place before the Owner comes home.

…never having to say, "Oops. Sorry, I farted."

I actually borrowed the punchline for the above comic from a Valentine’s Day card I saw in the store. Just added my own look to it.

What Dad or Husband hasn't felt this way?

Sometimes the mundane things we do for our families really mean the world to the ones we love.