Quick thoughts – but you must know, see and understand the parallels that are presented below (also in the Bible)…

Let’s take a quick look –

Israel is God’s chosen people.  Israel is God’s Bride. We know this because God issued Israel a SPIRITUAL bill of divorcement for her SPIRITUAL harlotries committed against God. Harlotries are also known as adulteries. God’s chosen were a wicked nation. They worshipped idols and sacrificed their own children to gods made with human hands. It really doesn’t get much more serious than that. If God is able to graft them back in and restore them unto their rightful place unto Him – and He will — how then can it be said that adultery is the end of a Covenant relationship — whether spiritual or physical? Reference the Book of Hosea. The first part of the book is a biblical account of Hosea and his earthly marriage, and his life as being a living and real-time prophecy of Israel. In other words, his own earthly marriage was a parallel of Israel’s spiritual marriage with her Husband, God. We know that God told Hosea to marry a woman of harlotries who followed her own lusts that lead her to many, many lovers – but it was not her unfaithfulness that was the focal point but rather it was her restoration that is key!! No matter her harlotries, God told Hosea to continue to love his wife and take her back. That is a symbolic parallel of God’s love for his chosen people Israel. Despite God’s condemnation and the harshness of language with which the unavoidable judgment was announced, the major purpose of the Book of Hosea is to proclaim God’s compassion and Covenant love that cannot and will not let His Bride Israel go.

The Church is Christ’s Bride. Ephesians 5:31-32 says marriage emulates salvation of the Church which is an unbreakable Covenant relationship – and when one commits physical (and spiritual) harlotries against their spouse (also represented by Christ, their Groom) — how is it that the Marriage Covenant relationship can be broken?

In the Old Testament – adultery was punishable by death. In the New Testament – adultery is forgiven. Reference the woman caught in the act of adultery and brought before the masses to be stoned to death. Jesus Himself forgave her and set her free. While serious enough in its very nature, it is NOT the unforgiveable and unpardonable sin.

Adultery is not only a physical harlotry, it is also a spiritual harlotry! The one-flesh union between husband and wife is a very mystical spiritual union. In the act of adultery, one takes their oneness with their spouse — which is also their oneness with Christ — and joins it in a spiritual union with another one who is foreign to that oneness between husband and wife and Christ who is one with both. However, even then if it doesn’t break your Covenant relationship with Christ, how then can it break your Covenant relationship with your spouse?

But is adultery only physical and spiritual? The Bible says that if a man even so much as looks at a woman with lust in his heart, he HAS committed adultery with her in his heart. So then it’s also a state of mind. Even so being, it still doesn’t break the Covenant. How many times have we, who belong to Christ and are one with Him, looked at “another.” The longings of the fleshly and carnal mind that makes us lust after things that are not of God — for example, our material idols like our houses and cars. How about our jobs. Maybe our habits. How about the secret things like running with a crowd we know has nothing to do with God that are doing some very serious deeds of darkness? Disloyalty to God on ANY level is spiritual adultery — and is no different than what Israel did when they worshipped the Baal’s and sacrificed their children on the pagan high places and then had sex in the temple with the temple prostitutes.

Folks, if what you are doing is NOT borne of the fruit of the Spirit, then it’s a SPIRITUAL harlotry. You have just committed adultery against your God! You were unfaithful to Him as a bride or groom is to their earthly spouse…

Question. For those who refuse to forgive their unfaithful spouse and love them back to their spiritual oneness through the pure love and power and mercy of their own blood-bought forgiveness – how do you think God should handle your spiritual harlotries?

Know this: What you use to measure and judge one by, God will surely use that same measure to mete out your judgment…

Are you and I really in the position to build our own throne?

…think about that…

–Celia Ann

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© 2010 Celia Ann. All rights reserved by Celia Ann and The Ephesian Marriage unless otherwise stated. All other symbols are the trademark of their respective owners.

Guys, when was the last time you felt set up by your wife?

Okay, so that was a pretty cruel trick to play on that poor guy in the video… It reminds me of those times that my wife has set me up to fail. Now let me be very clear… I don’t think she does it on purpose. I would even venture to say that most women don’t even realize that they are setting their husbands up for failure. Let me explain.

Ladies, have you ever asked your husband the following questions?

Does this dress look okay? Did you notice my haircut? How was dinner? Will you watch Miss America with me?

You see, the reality is that these things get us in trouble EVERY time!

If we say that we didn’t notice the haircut = FAIL for not noticing.

If we say yes we noticed = FAIL for not saying anything sooner.

And so this scenario plays out in many situations… I was reminded of this tonight as I joined Jennifer in watching the Miss America Pageant. It was during the swim suit portion that I began to feel somewhat trapped. You know what I mean… She and Cana were talking about how pretty each lady was and I knew that I COULD NOT SAY A WORD because if I agreed that would get me in trouble. However, if I chose not to watch… I WOULD BE IN TROUBLE. So, I sat and watched in silence… until the set up came…

Jennifer asked me who I thought would win. AHHGGG… WHAT DO I SAY? I answered that I thought Miss Virginia was pretty… and before Jennifer could say anything… Cana replies with, “DAD!”

Wow, my 10-year-old daughter has already picked up on the set up! Okay, Okay, I know that this is funny, but it is also TRUTH. When was the last time that a conversation like this started a fight? If you are a normal couple, you’ll have to admit that it’s happened.

So ladies, do us guys a favor, cut us some slack, and ask yourself next time… Am I setting him up?

And gentlemen, you’re not off the hook. By all means avoid the set up! Notice the haircut, complement dinner, and so on…

A foolish child is a calamity to a father;
      a quarrelsome wife is as annoying as constant dripping. 

Fathers can give their sons an inheritance of houses and wealth,
      but only the Lord can give an understanding wife.

Proverbs 19:13-14

My black caps arrived yesterday. They are beautifully made, but a bit smaller than my new white cap. I wanted them for home, rather than outings, so that is fine. They sit farther up my head, which means I need to put in a bun higher on the crown. I think they look rather Old World, like a Swiss costume cap. They are pleated down the back, and stiff, so they will shift less on my little head.

The bonnets, one for me and one for Child Patience, are again beautifully made. Hers is bright cobalt blue, and she loves it. She wore it from the time it arrived until supper, and wanted it again, although it was time for bed. Mine is black, Piker style, but sits tight over my ears and doesn’t come as far forward on my face as I like for a bonnet. Nonetheless, it is flattering in its way, fits well, and now I have an official outing bonnet for a trip I will be taking next week. It came without ties, so I will get ribbons on it today. It is close enough that it doesn’t block my peripheral vision, so I can drive in it, once the truck is back on the road. (With God’s blessings, next week!)

I now have to get Nicholas a new hat. His looks like it has seen combat with wild bears, but he wears it every day. I may buy an Amish straw hat for now, and get the black felt hat, expensive as it is, from Quebec. I should have a bit more cash in March, and will focus on his clothing needs then.

I was meditating this morning on what a blessing it is to be Plain, or at least practicing humility in dress. I don’t have anxieties about fashion, about trends, about colours and prints. I find what works for me and I stick with that. Even though I have capes and aprons and caps to pin on, and long hair to brush and put up, my total dressing time is less than fifteen minutes. How many fashionable women can say the same thing? I spend no time at all in salons or spas, and very little in clothing stores. I buy when something is completely worn out and can’t be mended any more.

Not that I’m proud of my humility – but I want to acknowledge that God has blessed me in this way, and blessed me with a husband who supports and understands my vocation to be Plain. The best blessing is that I am a visible witness to Christ, no matter where I go and who sees me. The world can see that there are some who are called to take their Christianity seriously, and who wear it consciously.

“I will sing of the LORD’s great love forever;  with my mouth I will make your faithfulness known through all generations (Psalm 89:1).”

I recently received advice from an old friend about getting my kids (including a couple who are not kids anymore) to participate in our economic situation at home.  We are all living under the same roof for the first time in years, but as it is with a lot of people in this recession, times are tough for us.

I was laying awake in the wee hours the other night thinking, as I sometimes do.  It occurred to me that perhaps we should start some kind of family business. After all, we have a lot of gifted people amongst us.  Surely we could think of something that would help us make some money. 

But there would be other benefits besides money to our involvement in this enterprise. Something of this kind could really serve to unite us.  Working together on a common project bonds people together.

It’s part of my job as a father to train my family.  Even the adult children under my roof should be able to come to me for counsel.   So this weekend I intend to hold a family meeting and broach this idea of a family business and the need for our family to all pitch in as an economic unit.

There are a lot of benefits for a father who participates in the lives of his children.  If we do our job right, our children  will bring us peace, joy, and even delight (Proverbs 29:3,17).  If we ignore our responsibilities as fathers to train our children, especially in the things of God, we do them a disservice. They will be less likely to curb their human capacity to engage in sin, either ones of commission or those of omission. They will make us and themselves miserable.

The apostle Paul had a relationship with a young man he called his “dear son” (II Timothy 1:2).  They weren’r related, but they had a father-son connection. Paul loved this man Timothy. Because of this, he exhorted the young man to “fan into flame the gift of God”.  (This gift was even imparted to Timothy by Paul!)    Paul charged him to be bold  in his use of this gift (I Timothy 1:4-7).

It’s our job as dads to love and teach our children. Their Christian lives  depend on our willingess to do this. So do the lives of their children, and their children’s children.

This question was recently given to the 7th grade students at the school where my wife is a teacher.  A summary of the essay question they had to answer was this: “If you had to choose, whom do you trust more: your parents, or your friends?  Give an example from your life about a time you chose to seek advice or support from one over the other.”

My wife was surprised and impressed by the overwhelming response favoring “Parents.”  She estimates that out of the 135 students, about 90% of them said that they would choose their parents over their friends if they had to choose.  Most students said that there are definitely times they would talk to their friends about issues they wouldn’t talk to their parents about; but when push comes to shove, they trust their parents more.

As a Youth Pastor, I regularly encourage parents by telling them, “YOU are the most important influence in your son/daughter’s life.”  I’m not sure how many believe me.  Our culture frequently tells us that peers are more influential than parental influence.

It’s also important to realize that parental influence, for some, can be a very negative influence.  If parents are unloving and distant, it can drive that child to act out in destructive ways to get attention or to seek acceptance by the wrong crowd.

Please realize that this does not mean: Good Parents = Good Kid or Bad Kid = Bad Parents.  There’s no scientific formula for parenting and raising healthy and mature children. There are other influences that are powerful, and those should not be ignored or diminished – but the most important of those influences is (and always will be) Parents!

Parents – be encouraged, be involved, be loving.  Ask good questions to your teenagers… and LISTEN to their responses (and listen to what they’re not saying, too).  Discipline your children when they’re young (but be loving and consistent – otherwise they may think your discipline is unmerited).

Pray for your children & Pray with them.  The cliché saying is true: “Families that pray together stay together.”  And families that pray and live out their faith among one another are even stronger still…

(Sorry this is late, but today got away from me, hence a 11 p.m. post)

No matter what your belief system, there is no denying that becoming a parent is a definite leap of faith: belief in family, hope for the future, even a trust in yourself not to totally foul up this thing called parenthood and the little one you are bringing into the world.

Nothing has taught me more about myself, and about my own values and trust in God, than becoming a parent.  As cliche as it sounds, the parent-child relationship really is unlike any other relationship we have, and I’m 100% sure that I could’ve grasped my own faith in quite the same way that I do now that I am a parent.  And I am also sure that I have grown personally in ways that never would have happened had I never taken that leap of faith and welcomed Grace into our lives.

I’m sure my understanding of faith in both God and myself will continue to morph as my children grow, but right now I believe two things: (1) as a person, I am not only more stronger than I ever thought, but also my fumbling and bumbling is “good enough.”  I really struggle with this concept off and on, and especially in my younger years dealt a lot with insecurity.  But it’s amazing how much confidence parenthood can give you. So far I don’t seem to have messed up Grace too badly, in spite of the fact that I am a bit more of a pushover than I thought I would be and I am hopeless at sleep training.

And (2) I am starting to believe more and more that the God-me relationship doesn’t have to be so hard and that the struggling and striving I do may be a lot like Grace, and how she becomes angry and thrashes about and squalls, when all she has to do is allow herself to be held by her mama and nursed, and she would get all she needs just from that.  And her happiest times are when she does just that.  When Jesus says to approach the Father like a little child, maybe it is not so complicated after all.  And this gives me great hope, that even for a very flawed mother and person like me, there’s a very abundant life ahead.

Now I know that definitely not all my readers can relate to my Christian worldview and the particular reasons for my hope, but I would hope that we can all find a measure of confidence, faith, and optimism as we continue this journey of raising our children.  I truly believe that our kids’ futures and the way they will see the world depends on it.

“When in another’s monastery, do not keep your own ordo.” This is an old Russian proverb, meaning something like ‘When in Rome, do as the Romans do.” Don’t bring your rules into someone else’s place. They have their own rules; you abide by them.

This does assume that the monastery visited has good rules. Yours are just different, maybe equally good, but it is not proper etiquette to impose them on your hosts. Some of us have had that experience with house guests. They always stay up until 3 a.m.; we go to bed by 10 p.m., and having someone in the next room, listening to music, walking around, cooking a meal even, is disruptive and troubling.

We are now back fulltime in Anglican territory. It’s the old monastery, and we have to conform to its rules. Mostly, that’s not a problem. They are good rules. But there are a few points where I feel I don’t want to change back.

Take the way we keep track of time. I’m not sure why Christians insist on using the old names for the days of the week and the months. I don’t like invoking the Roman and Norse gods every day. I think the Church Universal needs to say First Day, Second Day, and so on, as the Quakers tried to teach them. Months are First Month, Second Month, and on; isn’t this more accurate anyway?

Plain dress makes some people nervous, especially Anglicans, who expect to blend into the world. But that strategy doesn’t seem to be working, does it? We got run over by that world, and we are forgetting rather quickly what it means to be Christians, to be different, to stand up and be counted for Christ. (And He will return to count His sheep – are some of us hiding in wolves’ clothing? Will He say to those who are disguised in worldly dress, “I know you not”?) When we were seminarians, we were told to wear our collars once we were ordained, to not be ashamed of that badge of office. Yet sometimes the world looks upon it as a sign of hypocrisy and privilege, because so many clerics used it as such. The collar doesn’t work for me anymore. It never did. I told my ordaining bishop I didn’t want to wear it, as it is men’s attire. He insisted that I wear it on certain occasions, and those certain occasions equalled just about all my waking hours, except when I was in the barn.

Nicholas rather accidentally removed most of his beard. (His vision and coordination are still poor.) He’s shaved it off, ready for it to grow back. He looks fine without it, and he says that it feels good to have a clean chin. Now, it is his decision to make, and he won’t be less Plain without the beard, as many Mennonite men eschew them. But the “Brethren” beard symbolizes the pacifist stance, the refusal to bear arms, and the turning away from the vanity of the world. Is he ready to give up that statement?

I am no less a Christian if my head is bare, or I am wearing jeans, but my own ordo says that I want to be counted for Christ, I want the world to know that a Christian has come amongst them, that I am no longer literally buying vanity and false beauty.

My Plain ways, my keeping the Plain calendar, my prayer cap and my aprons may embarrass some and convict others, but it is my podvig, sometimes hard to bear, but a joy in Christ.

Often when I answer this question, “Southeast Christian Academy at Emmanuel Baptist,” people respond with a casual, “Oh, ok…” but then sometimes added to that is the look. Nothing negative is said, but the look says a lot. People just don’t understand why we would choose to send our kids to a private classical christian school when our local school system is a good school system. Well, we had a moment at our house today that really spoke to me…

After finishing homework before 4pm this afternoon (yay!) My son asked to play the wii…no. Watch a movie?…no. “We are not turning on the tv today. You can read a book or play outside or draw or find something else to do.” “Oh…ok,” he said in his best Simba-you-might-need -to-work-on-that-little-roar-of-yours voice, and he disappeared into his room.

A second later…”Mom, can you get my helmet for me, please?” This is a very typical request. He has a plastic, don’t-wear-this-if-you-are-really-playing-footbal, UGA helmet. He wears it around the house all the time. So much that the black “G” stickers on either side are almost scratched completely off.

“Sure, buddy.”

Maybe 2 minutes later he and little sister emerge from his room and he announces that they are about to sword fight. I look up and he is wearing the helmet, a GA Bulldog t shirt with a big “G” on the chest, black soccer shorts that are too short, a brown belt, and hiking boots. He also is holding a foam, nerf type baseball bat (also GA Bulldog) and his empty arm is stuck through the paper covering for one of his Disney DVDs. Quite an outfit.

Little sister is not wearing any form of protection. Her sword is an actual wooden bat; a tiny Louisville Slugger replica we got from the factory in Louisville, KY. It fits her little 3 year old hands perfectly. She stands poised to go into battle. Gleam in her eye. Ready to destroy anything and anyone who gets in her way. Which would be my living room and her brother.

“I don’t think there will be any sword fighting today,” I tell him as I remove the bat from her clenched fist.

“BUT MOM!” he protests. I being to reply, calling him by name, but then I pause.

There is a lot unsaid in that tiny pause. Hopefully he is hearing the sirens going off in his mind…WARNING…WARNING…YOU HAVE JUST VIOLATED SECTION 4, PARAGRAPH 2, LINE C, AMMENDMENT 2 OF THE HOUSEHOLD MISSION STATEMENT. LET IT BE HEREBY KNOWN THAT NO SENTENCE SHALL BE INITIATED WITH THE WORDS “BUT MOM” FOR ANY REASON, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES. However, because this ammendment was recently added, and not in democratic fashion, I am also pausing so he can finish his sentence.

“This is the sword of the Spirit,” as he holds the baseball bat high in to the air. *pause*

“And this is the shield of faith,” as he holds out the paper DVD case hanging on his arm. *pause*

“And this is the helmet of salvation,” *taps his head*

“And these are the sandals of faith,” *stomps his foot*

“And this is the belt of truth and this is the breastplate of righteousness.” * touches his belt and the “G” on his t shirt.*
“Wow, that sounds like the whole armor of God, buddy.” I am almost speechless. What first grader does this?

“Can you say the whole thing?” I asked him.

“Yeah, it’s Ephesians 6:10-18. We learned it at school.” And then he recites the entire passage for me and his dad with prompting only twice, maybe.

“Finally be strong in the Lord and in His mighty power. Put on the full armor of God so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the Word of God. And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the saints.”

My husband and I just stare at him and then at each other. I am immediately convicted about how much scripture I do not have memorized. I am in awe of the ease in which my young son can memorize passages like this. I wonder, if a Bible verse I have memorized EVER crossed over into my “play time”?

There are many, many reasons we choose to send our children to Southeast Christian Academy, but what we witnessed today in the living room is at the top of the list.

Now that I’m wearing traditional cape dresses, there were a few details to work out. Some of it seems sort of medieval,in a way, but in a good way. I don’t have to wear linsey-woolsey or anything that requires a forge to repair.

Things have to be pinned together. Capes get pinned to aprons, aprons are closed by pins. The necklines on the dresses and capes close with a snap, which is not medieval and quite convenient. I have to buy some new pins, since the cheap dressmaker pins I have bend. Safety pins work well, though, and husband doesn’t complain about my prickliness.

The cape gets pinned in three places – left and right edges behind the apron waistband, and the point in back, to the apron waistband again. The apron pins left or right, depnding on who made the apron. Old Order type aprons do not tie in the back. It was probably considered a waste of fabric and a bit of frivolity to have a big bow hovering over the bum.

I’m used to longer hemlines, too. But most Old Order dresses come to mid-calf rather than ankle, which means I have to choose my socks and underskirt more carefully so as not to have gaps. Knee-length bloomers work well instead of a slip, especially if they are made of cotton. (I bought a pair in the oddest place – Loblaw’s Superstore! I think they were meant to be pajama bottoms, but they have a drawstring waist, a lace insert above the knee, and are just above the kneecap in length. And they look just like Victorian drawers.)

The new cap is not as close-fitting as the soft caps I used to wear. I can’t pin them to my head, because my hair and bun are not thick enough. I am holding the cap in place with two clippies on either side of the nape. Bobby pins just slid out. But the cap stays on better, and keeps my hair neater, since it doesn’t move around as much.

I am a natural fibre kind of girl, so I was a little dubious about the synthetic fabrics used in my dresses. Still, they launder well and hang on my small frame properly, so I am not complaining. The synthetics are silkier, and they fit closer, meaning I don’t have as much fabric bunched up around my waist when wearing an apron. Incredibly modest as a cape dress is, I look more petite and feminine in them.