I want to believe in them. I want to know that my love will one day come for me. And that when he comes, he’ll come indeed (in-deed), not just in words.  And false promises.

If you’re married, how many times has your spouse saved you from making a bad decision?  I’ve lost count.  Good words here from author and counselor Dr. Gary Chapman on making decisions in marriage.  This one is addressed to men, but it works both ways.  Both husbands and wives need each other’s perspectives to make good decisions.

Most counselors agree that one of the greatest problems in marriage is decision making.  Visions of democracy dance in the minds of many young couples, but when there are only two voting members, democracy often results in deadlock.  How does a couple move beyond deadlock?  The answer is found in one word: love.

Love always asks the question, “What is best for you?”  Love does not demand its own way.  Love seeks to bring pleasure to the one loved.  That is why Christians should have less trouble making decisions than non-Christians.  We are called to be lovers.  When I love my wife, I will not seek to force my will upon her for selfish purposes.

The biblical idea of the husband being the head of the wife has been one of the most exploited concepts of the Bible.  Christian husbands, full of self-will, have made all kinds of foolish demands of their wives under the authority of “The Bible says….”  Headship does not mean that the husband has the right to make all the decisions and inform the wife of what is going to be done.

She is called to be a “helpmate”.  The word means “helper”.  How can she be a helper if she has no opportunity to share her ideas?  “Two are better than one,” the Scriptures say.  That is certainly true in decision making.  Why would a husband want to make a decision limited to his own wisdom when God has given him a helper?

I am a new creation, no more in condemnation
Here in the grace of God I stand.
My heart is overflowing, my love just keeps on growing,
Here in the grace of God I stand.

And I will praise You Lord, yes I will praise You Lord,
And I will sing of all that You have done.
A joy that knows no limit, a lightness in my spirit,
Here in the grace of God I stand.

©1983 Kingsway’s Thankyou Music Words and Music by Dave Bilgrough

Things have been a bit challenging of late, and I have found myself forced to lean more and more on God’s strength, and relying on His grace to flow through me, as I forgive people. Its amazing what peace He gives you when you know you cannot do it alone, and you rely on Him to carry you. It truly is a peace that passes all human understanding. In myself, I should have been angry and resentful, and unforgiving. But I gave the situation to the Lord, and He gave me the grace to forgive. He reminded me that this matter that I needed to forgive was miniscule compared to what He forgave by sending His Son to die for me. Psalm 103:12 says “as far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us.”.

How great is our God, that He can make us new and help us to forgive and carry us through the times where we cannot carry ourselves.
How great is He that when we cannot find the words to pray because of the pain, He not only hears our hearts, but gives us the words to speak.
How great is He, that when our natures would speak hate, He speaks kindness and forgiveness.

Pray that your husband will safeguard his heart against inappropriate relationships with the opposite sex. Pray that his heart will be pure and undivided in his commitment to you.

Proverbs 6:23-26
For their command is a lamp
and their instruction a light;
their corrective discipline
is the way to life.
It will keep you from the immoral woman,
from the smooth tongue of a promiscuous woman.
Don’t lust for her beauty.
Don’t let her coy glances seduce you.
For a prostitute will bring you to poverty,
but sleeping with another man’s wife will cost you your life.

Romans 13:14
Instead, clothe yourself with the presence of the Lord Jesus Christ. And don’t let yourself think about ways to indulge your evil desires.

You publish a lot of quality content (trust us, we know). And so we understand that making it easily accessible to your faithful readers is very important for you as a blogger. Sure, our Categories, Tag Cloud, and Archives widgets do their parts, but we’ve come up with an extra little something that you may care to use.

Enter our newest shortcode – [archives].

This little guy will allow you to quickly and easily add a post index to anywhere on your blog (page, post, or text widget). Use the shortcode as is, and it will output a listing of all posts ever published on your blog. But it’s your show, so you get to decide what and how the shortcode generates your post index using a variety of options. Check out a number of examples of the shortcode being used here.

Ever want to see your weekly archives displayed in a drop-down menu? Now you can. Here’s ours:

– July 27, 2009–August 2, 2009
July 20, 2009–July 26, 2009
July 13, 2009–July 19, 2009
July 6, 2009–July 12, 2009
June 29, 2009–July 5, 2009
June 15, 2009–June 21, 2009
June 1, 2009–June 7, 2009
May 11, 2009–May 17, 2009
May 4, 2009–May 10, 2009
April 27, 2009–May 3, 2009
April 20, 2009–April 26, 2009
April 13, 2009–April 19, 2009
April 6, 2009–April 12, 2009
March 30, 2009–April 5, 2009
March 23, 2009–March 29, 2009
March 9, 2009–March 15, 2009
March 2, 2009–March 8, 2009
February 16, 2009–February 22, 2009
February 2, 2009–February 8, 2009
January 12, 2009–January 18, 2009
January 5, 2009–January 11, 2009
December 29, 2008–January 4, 2009
December 22, 2008–December 28, 2008
December 8, 2008–December 14, 2008
December 1, 2008–December 7, 2008
November 24, 2008–November 30, 2008
November 17, 2008–November 23, 2008
November 10, 2008–November 16, 2008
November 3, 2008–November 9, 2008
October 27, 2008–November 2, 2008
October 20, 2008–October 26, 2008
October 13, 2008–October 19, 2008
September 29, 2008–October 5, 2008
September 22, 2008–September 28, 2008
September 15, 2008–September 21, 2008
September 8, 2008–September 14, 2008
September 1, 2008–September 7, 2008
August 18, 2008–August 24, 2008
August 11, 2008–August 17, 2008
August 4, 2008–August 10, 2008
July 28, 2008–August 3, 2008
July 21, 2008–July 27, 2008
June 30, 2008–July 6, 2008
June 16, 2008–June 22, 2008
June 2, 2008–June 8, 2008
May 19, 2008–May 25, 2008
May 5, 2008–May 11, 2008
April 28, 2008–May 4, 2008
April 21, 2008–April 27, 2008
April 14, 2008–April 20, 2008
March 31, 2008–April 6, 2008
March 3, 2008–March 9, 2008
February 4, 2008–February 10, 2008
January 28, 2008–February 3, 2008
January 21, 2008–January 27, 2008
January 14, 2008–January 20, 2008
January 7, 2008–January 13, 2008
December 24, 2007–December 30, 2007
December 17, 2007–December 23, 2007
December 3, 2007–December 9, 2007
November 19, 2007–November 25, 2007
November 5, 2007–November 11, 2007
October 22, 2007–October 28, 2007
October 15, 2007–October 21, 2007
October 8, 2007–October 14, 2007
September 17, 2007–September 23, 2007
September 10, 2007–September 16, 2007
September 3, 2007–September 9, 2007
August 20, 2007–August 26, 2007
August 13, 2007–August 19, 2007
August 6, 2007–August 12, 2007
July 30, 2007–August 5, 2007
July 23, 2007–July 29, 2007
July 16, 2007–July 22, 2007
July 9, 2007–July 15, 2007
July 2, 2007–July 8, 2007
June 25, 2007–July 1, 2007
June 11, 2007–June 17, 2007
June 4, 2007–June 10, 2007
May 28, 2007–June 3, 2007
May 21, 2007–May 27, 2007
May 14, 2007–May 20, 2007
May 7, 2007–May 13, 2007
April 30, 2007–May 6, 2007
April 23, 2007–April 29, 2007
April 16, 2007–April 22, 2007
April 2, 2007–April 8, 2007
March 26, 2007–April 1, 2007
March 19, 2007–March 25, 2007
March 5, 2007–March 11, 2007
February 26, 2007–March 4, 2007
February 19, 2007–February 25, 2007
February 12, 2007–February 18, 2007
February 5, 2007–February 11, 2007
January 29, 2007–February 4, 2007
January 15, 2007–January 21, 2007
January 8, 2007–January 14, 2007
January 1, 2007–January 7, 2007
December 25, 2006–December 31, 2006
December 18, 2006–December 24, 2006
December 11, 2006–December 17, 2006
December 4, 2006–December 10, 2006
November 20, 2006–November 26, 2006
November 6, 2006–November 12, 2006
October 30, 2006–November 5, 2006
October 23, 2006–October 29, 2006
October 16, 2006–October 22, 2006
October 9, 2006–October 15, 2006
October 2, 2006–October 8, 2006
September 25, 2006–October 1, 2006
September 18, 2006–September 24, 2006
September 11, 2006–September 17, 2006
September 4, 2006–September 10, 2006
August 28, 2006–September 3, 2006
August 14, 2006–August 20, 2006
August 7, 2006–August 13, 2006
July 31, 2006–August 6, 2006
July 24, 2006–July 30, 2006
July 10, 2006–July 16, 2006
July 3, 2006–July 9, 2006
June 26, 2006–July 2, 2006
June 19, 2006–June 25, 2006
June 12, 2006–June 18, 2006
June 5, 2006–June 11, 2006
May 29, 2006–June 4, 2006
May 22, 2006–May 28, 2006
May 15, 2006–May 21, 2006
May 1, 2006–May 7, 2006
April 10, 2006–April 16, 2006
April 3, 2006–April 9, 2006
March 27, 2006–April 2, 2006
March 20, 2006–March 26, 2006
March 13, 2006–March 19, 2006
March 6, 2006–March 12, 2006
February 20, 2006–February 26, 2006
February 6, 2006–February 12, 2006
January 23, 2006–January 29, 2006
January 16, 2006–January 22, 2006
January 9, 2006–January 15, 2006
January 2, 2006–January 8, 2006
December 19, 2005–December 25, 2005
December 12, 2005–December 18, 2005
December 5, 2005–December 11, 2005
November 21, 2005–November 27, 2005
September 26, 2005–October 2, 2005

Enjoy!

“They shall plant vineyards and eat their fruit…They shall not plant and another eat; For as the days of a tree so shall be the days of My people, and My elect shall long enjoy the work of their hands.”  Isaiah 66:21, 22

For the past four weeks I have been on bed rest, lying prone day and night except for brief, necessary excursions.  My doctor and I are trying to protect the life of a new little baby growing inside me.  She believes the need for bed rest could continue for a long time, perhaps the duration of my pregnancy, about four more months.  In the grand length of a life, this is not a real long time, but right now it seems quite formidable.

There have been many times in my life that I have been SO tired.  I longed for lengthy rest times.  Often my body would succumb and I would end up sick in bed, but not for this long.

In those tired times I’ve thought about Heaven.  I didn’t mind the idea of sitting on a cloud and playing a harp for all eternity.  In fact sometimes I’ve been rather put out with the idea of “no night there” and that we will plant vineyards and do other useful work.  In my mind I thought maybe Jesus would understand if I stay back in my city home and take a nap while others do the planting.  Yes, I’ve been that tired in my life to think such things.

But God is so gracious in bringing me new insight.  During these weeks my body has felt like a wound-up spring.  I’ve had to force myself to stillness and remind myself not to pick Andrew up when he cries, not to fold that load of laundry that needs to come out of the dryer, not to cook supper for my family, not to water my morning glories or deadhead all my petunias.  I’ve stopped myself from (enjoyable) useful labor in favor of lying flat and staying calm and serene.  For the baby, I remind myself.

Tonight the thought occurred to me:  I’m glad Heaven isn’t like this.  This is not bliss, as I once imagined.  Useful labor for the Master is far better to me than doing nothing for all eternity. 

So I’ve changed my mind.  I’m going to ask Jesus for my golden spade when I get There!

Thanks, Lord, for this new understanding, and for the precious time You’re giving me while on bed rest, learning from You.

“Pray that your husband will love righteousness and hate wickedness, especially the evils of the culture. Pray that he will recognise and avoid wickedness in his own life, and if necessary, take a clear strong stand against evil. (Proverbs 27:12; John 17:15; 1 Corinthians 10:12-13)”

The prudent see danger and take refuge,
but the simple keep going and suffer for it.Proverbs 27:12

My prayer is not that you take them out of the world but that you protect them from the evil one. John 17:15

So, if you think you are standing firm, be careful that you don’t fall! No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it. 1 Corinthians 10:12-13

I realised the power of prayer and the power of God today. I realised how these 31 days will make a difference to my marriage and my husband. Today’s prayer is: “Pray that your husband will be faithful to his wedding vows. Pray that he will have a desire to cultivate your relationship as a sign of his loyalty and commitment to you, and as a picture of Christ’s love for the church. (Proverbs 20:6; Gen 2:24)”

“For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh.” Gen 2:24

“Many a man claims to have unfailing love, but a faithful man who can find?” Proverbs 20:6

Its amazing how easy we think marriage is, and staying faithful to our spouse, this all before we are actually married. After the wedding, Satan sends his armies full force to attack God’s precious institution. He does not want happy marriages, or happy families. He wants men to stray and women to fight for power. He strives in the chaos of our breaking marriages. But we can prevent this… By praying for our marriages and praying that the Master will hold them in His hand and heal the cracks. By praying that He keeps our men faithful and true to their vows. I have learnt this today… My God is a good and majestic God… One who wants only the best for me… Even in times of trouble and heartache. If He is the centre of our lives and marriages, they will succeed. This is my prayer for you all… That Christ may be central to your marriages, so that you and you spouse will remain faithful to each other and the Lord.

“When asked his secret of love, being married fifty-four years to the same
person, Billy Graham said, ‘Ruth and I are happily incompatible.’”

Your ability to love your spouse has nothing to do with how compatible you are. Love is something you do even when it doesn’t feel good to do it. Follow Christ’s example and love as He did. That kind of love covers a multitude of sins.

Today, is my son’s 14^th birthday.  Instead of having cake, today … we saw them last night.  Our shared concert experiences began years, ago with our seeing Cheap Trick together when he was six years old.  We both really love music and over the years, my son has become my concert companion.  Sometimes we see someone we both want to see like Joe Satriani or Daniel Johnston.  Sometimes we see someone that just one of us really wants to see.  My son will owe me forever for taking him to see Weird Al Yankovic a few years, ago.  He even insisted that we stay for any encores.  The best part of the experience was after the show, as we were heading home.  I don’t believe I’ve ever seen more “white” (& of course “nerdy”) people, at a single event in my life than at that concert.  As we drove home … we took turns crafting completions for the sentence … “it was like …” – to describe the concert crowd:

It was like a …

“Osmond Family Festival in Salt Lake”

“Peter, Paul, & Mary Hootenanny in Boise”

“Happy Days cast reunion”

“Amish Quilting jamboree”

My son and I have a multitude of things in common like shared traits, styles, mannerisms, interests, and above all our sense of humor.  If funny can be found, in a given circumstance … we’ll find it.  And we are looking to find “funny” always.  If it were possible, I am confident he and I could find a discreet corner to crack jokes, at our own funerals.  I am pleased that finding the humor in life experiences is important to him and pray it always will be.

Although, my son and I have many commonalities … we are also, unique in many ways.  I am glad that we can share many aspects of life but I am also, pleased to see my son growing, as an independent soul.  The last thing I would ever want is for him to simply, follow or be like me in some mirror-manner.  I desire for him to be all that God created him to be; and that must mean his being himself … and not another me.

The last couple of years have been hard for he and I at times, as so many significant changes have occurred.  My marriage of 17 years, ended … he went from only small private schools to public … we moved from our home, into an apartment … changed churches … and much more – all this occurring, as he hit the very transitional ages of 12 and 13.  It has been hard for him at times to really give value to maturing and looking to assume more responsibility.  I understand this is often common to the age but I have also, struggled at times to understand this … and simply, be understanding for him.  I love my son incredibly.  I have always had a wonderful relationship with him and I am glad that I have taken every opportunity to grow our relationship.  As he hits another birthday … I realize how little time I have remaining with him, in certain respects.  He is now, in the very formative period of life where he will grow increasingly independent, as he should at this point in life.  He cannot fully appreciate how his life will further change over the next 10 years no matter how much exchange we share.  I pray for my son to define his foundation of faith, as he will need this to go forward in life … and to keep his focus on Christ – always!