Has it been a month already?  Time flies when you are having fun.

5th week’s vital statistics:  -3.4 lbs  current weight: 225  lbs, or 16.1 stones, or if you like 102.1 kgs. this is a total of 13.8 lbs down(1 stone or 6.3 kg)!

Psalm 34:10

The young lions suffer want and hunger;but those who seek the Lord lack no good thing.

ok ok, so maybe the hunger verse did give me an ironic chuckle, but the meaning remains.  I lack in no good thing.  The lord is with me and is my comfort in all things.

It is so easy to get caught up in the numbers game.  Fall into worry that this week I didn’t lose enough or why is this taking so long?  Thankfully God is so gracious that he supplies me with peace.  I might not know that it is there at first, but as soon as I call out to him it is there without question!

Philippians 4 : 4-7

4 Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, Rejoice. 5 Let your reasonableness be known to everyone. The Lord is at hand; 6 do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. 7 And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

Please go and watch or listen to another Rachel share her hope and faith in Jesus. She is a wife and mother and she is dying of cancer. I was convicted, encouraged, and made to examine my own heart and who God is through her wise, true, hopeful words. It’s well worth your time.

I will never forget the look on Lisa’s face during the affair. There was something about her that I find very hard to explain today. I could see something strange and tormenting in her eyes as she looked at me and even as she looked away from me. She was looking for something else. She wanted something other than what God had given to her. She was using the beauty God had given her for her own glory and, in the meantime, was destroying our home. 

I remember hurting so deeply when she would dress up so beautifully to go somewhere else, but do so little to please me with her looks. I remember questioning her several times as she left to “go to work” about why she was so concerned about her looks when she was going to work in a tough and dirty environment. What I didn’t know at that time, was that she was going to work to impress and please him. Her heart was given over to another and she was striving to please him. The way she dressed and the looks on her face were heart-breaking. I felt like I was being eaten-alive by her glances and disdain for me. She didn’t care about me and no matter how many times she said she did, she proved otherwise. Her heart was given over to another, and I, her husband, was receiving the heavy blows of all of it.

While reading in Hosea this morning, I found this reality staring right back in my face. I couldn’t believe that the words I just shared with you were jumping right off the pages of the Bible:

“Let her remove the adulterous look from her face and the unfaithfulness from between her breasts.”

Hosea 2:2 NIV

God understood those looks. He knew exactly what I was feeling, but on a much deeper level. I had worked hard to be a good husband, but I still hadn’t been perfect and had screwed up plenty. God has been perfect in dealing with all of us, and we have continually been unfaithful. God was feeling what I was feeling in a much deeper way. Why? He had made her for a specific purpose, and she had strayed from it. Her body was being used to please someone she was never intended to see, touch, or think of in those ways. God was being dishonored on a different level than I understood at the time.

I found the only way to deal with the immense pain of Lisa’s affair was to take it to the only one who could really understand it. I needed to love her as Christ had and was still loving me. If I was to uphold my vow of “until death do us part”, I had to look past her foolish unfaithful heart and love her while she was still a sinner. This is exactly what God did for me.

If you want to heal from the unfaithfulness of your spouse, look no further than your own Savior and your own sin. Jesus Christ has loved you in your unfaithfulness. Go and do likewise.

Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.
Philippians 4:4-7 NKJV

Is it just me or should someone have shared this verse with Chicken Little?  Poor guy!  He was simply trying to warn everyone of an impending doom right?  He should have to suffer from all of the ridicule and pain shouldn’t he?

You know, I think part of a child’s DNA is composed of anxiety.  Granted, all of them show it differently, but they all have it.  Whether they are anxious about their grades, friends, audition, or in our household, the daily schedule, anxiety commands a lot of our children’s thought processes.  I do not believe I would be going too far on a limb to say that most of us never grow out of it.

So how do you use the movie Chicken Little to discuss Phil 4 and anxiety?  There are a couple of key lessons to highlight with your child as you watch the movie:

1.  Anxiety is like a cold, it spreads quickly. Notice how the entire town goes absolutely crazy when Chicken Little’s first episode occurs.  It becomes a pandemic very quickly.  A recent example of anxiety spreading over something that may or may not have been something terribly concerning would be that of the swine flu.  It seemed like in only a few short hours, the world was going to be taken to its knees by this new virus.  Only three weeks later, I see very little about this all-powerful flu… so would that be 2009’s “The Sky is Falling!”  Anxiety spreads and makes things worse, Phil 4 tells us not to be anxious!

2. The Bible teaches us to hold fast to Christ, He gives us the ability to be anxious for nothing, for He is our Shepherd. Spend some time explaining to your child the role and characteristics of a plain ole shepherd and then help them understand how Christ is the Good Shepherd.  He said, “my sheep know my voice.”

3.  Our anxieties are funny to God. One of the things I love about this movie is how it accurately portrays false anxiety.  We can usually run around like a chicken with our head cut off when really, we should spend time resting in the promise that Christ will never forsake us.  Help your children understand that to Christ, our anxieties are sometimes if not most of the time crippling to our faith.  Faith is the ability to let go of our anxieties and cling more to the hope and promise we have in Christ’s sovereignty.

Sure, we all have anxieties and some would say they are inevitable and inescapable, but Christ told us to “cast our cares upon him.”   Part of being a dad, uncle, older brother or whatever type of leader you are, is having the ability to teach children to trust in Christ alone.  If you’re like me, maybe if you say it enough to them, you will start to remind yourself of this solid, yet simple truth.

If you would like more in this series, please be sure to check out the other articles in Using Movies to Witness.

About the Writer:

Trent Cotton has spent a number of years in management and business consulting. After spending some time in the field, he joined the HR department, beginning in recruiting and eventually serving as the Department Head of HR for one of the major lines of business. With such a varied background, he works to bring all of these together to help churches and other Christian organizations incorporate some common business practices into their ministries to enable them to better serve the Kingdom. He currently works for SourcePointe, an HR Outsourcing Agency while continuing to own and operate Christian Management Consulting as a ministry. In his free time, he also writes a lot on Church Development as a Church Consultant.

As a husband and father of three, Trent Cotton has a passion surrounding the role Christian Men are to play in their families, communities, churches and businesses.  This particular blog is dedicated to helping men take back the role that we have lost in society.

As I was driving through an industrial section of town, a few days ago, I happened to notice a windshield repair company sitting next to, of all things, a child care.

Thinking the site a little odd, I gave a moment of thought to the meaning of both.

I thought of the reasons for there to be a windshield repair establishment in this part of town.  With the industrial nature of the area, it is not uncommon for sand and relatively large gravel to coat the street, more than likely having fallen from large dump trucks conveying sand and gravel from nearby pits for use in manufacturing facilities in the area.

These grains of sand and gravel can be picked up by tires of passing vehicles and rocketed into the windshield of other vehicles.  Each grain of sand striking the glass on oncoming vehicles digs into the smooth surface gouging a very small, almost imperceptible, piece of glass.  Each strike rendering damage that is almost impossible to repair.

With each successive grain of sand, another crater is created, moment by moment, day upon day, the onslaught continues as the drivers pass by unaware of the damage being done.  Slowly the accumulation of gouges and craters take away a portion of the smooth, transparent surface of the windshield, until there are more damaged areas than not.

The final recourse is to replace the windshield altogether and discard the damaged one.  The only way to avoid repeated damage to the new windshield is to take another path to work.

The child care, not unlike the glass repair establishment, takes in children in varying stages of injury.  Some are injured by well meaning parents who, in an effort to control or guide their children, use harsh words or cutting criticism that tear away small pieces of the shining new surface of an innocent child’s heart.  In most cases parents don’t intend harm.  They are running late for work, or the traffic is heavy, they are working in a high stress situation and the child is not cooperative.  Sometimes they are just trying to help the child avoid the same mistakes they have made themselves.  Perhaps their child will be more successful than they are.

What ever the reason, moment by moment, day upon day, the onslaught continues, as parents go about their lives unaware of the subtle damage their words are doing.  Each word, however intended, creating gouges and craters in the pure shining heart of a child, created by God, and given everything necessary to be successful in life.  Slowly this accumulation of gouges and craters tears away enough of the heart of the child that they slip into something they were not created to be.

There is no way to remove the old, damaged heart of a child and replace it with a new one.  Every attempt to do so will, in fact, drive the child further from who they are and into someone they are not.

Fortunately the child, unlike the windshield, can be repaired.  As parents we must pay close attention to the words we use and the actions we take.  We must audit our intentions and assure they are driven by love and not some other reason.

We are told in Proverbs “Pleasant words are a honeycomb, Sweet to the soul and healing to the bones”. (Proverbs 16:24)

Nothing is truer; we can control the words we speak.  If we understand the impact of what we say, we can make a difference in the lives of our children.

Like a shiny new windshield, we hold, in our children, a certain amount of satisfaction.  Knowing we can safely see what the future brings.

Keep them clean and mind the roads you direct them down and your words of love will heal their broken and pitted hearts.

En servicio como padre

Dave

Malachy's was so excited that i finished his Irish scarf that he wanted to wear it to school today!

Thanks to my lovely friend Kelly I have learned how to knit.  Of course you know that my first project would have something to do with Ireland!  Malachy went with me to pick out the yarn and, surprise, he wanted green, white, and gold!

I finished the scarf last night, crept into malachy’s room, and laid it in his arms so that he would have a surprise when he woke up. It worked!  This morning he bounded into my room, snuggling his scarf, exclaiming “you finished my scarf! you finished my scarf! Now you can make me mittens!”  Just in time for the summer, right wee boy?

Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.
Philippians 4:4-7 NKJV

Is it just me or should someone have shared this verse with Chicken Little?  Poor guy!  He was simply trying to warn everyone of an impending doom right?  He should have to suffer from all of the ridicule and pain shouldn’t he?

You know, I think part of a child’s DNA is composed of anxiety.  Granted, all of them show it differently, but they all have it.  Whether they are anxious about their grades, friends, audition, or in our household, the daily schedule, anxiety commands a lot of our children’s thought processes.  I do not believe I would be going too far on a limb to say that most of us never grow out of it.

So how do you use the movie Chicken Little to discuss Phil 4 and anxiety?  There are a couple of key lessons to highlight with your child as you watch the movie:

1.  Anxiety is like a cold, it spreads quickly. Notice how the entire town goes absolutely crazy when Chicken Little’s first episode occurs.  It becomes a pandemic very quickly.  A recent example of anxiety spreading over something that may or may not have been something terribly concerning would be that of the swine flu.  It seemed like in only a few short hours, the world was going to be taken to its knees by this new virus.  Only three weeks later, I see very little about this all-powerful flu… so would that be 2009’s “The Sky is Falling!”  Anxiety spreads and makes things worse, Phil 4 tells us not to be anxious!

2. The Bible teaches us to hold fast to Christ, He gives us the ability to be anxious for nothing, for He is our Shepherd. Spend some time explaining to your child the role and characteristics of a plain ole shepherd and then help them understand how Christ is the Good Shepherd.  He said, “my sheep know my voice.”

3.  Our anxieties are funny to God. One of the things I love about this movie is how it accurately portrays false anxiety.  We can usually run around like a chicken with our head cut off when really, we should spend time resting in the promise that Christ will never forsake us.  Help your children understand that to Christ, our anxieties are sometimes if not most of the time crippling to our faith.  Faith is the ability to let go of our anxieties and cling more to the hope and promise we have in Christ’s sovereignty.

Sure, we all have anxieties and some would say they are inevitable and inescapable, but Christ told us to “cast our cares upon him.”   Part of being a dad, uncle, older brother or whatever type of leader you are, is having the ability to teach children to trust in Christ alone.  If you’re like me, maybe if you say it enough to them, you will start to remind yourself of this solid, yet simple truth.

If you would like more in this series, please be sure to check out the other articles in Using Movies to Witness.

About the Writer:

Trent Cotton has spent a number of years in management and business consulting. After spending some time in the field, he joined the HR department, beginning in recruiting and eventually serving as the Department Head of HR for one of the major lines of business. With such a varied background, he works to bring all of these together to help churches and other Christian organizations incorporate some common business practices into their ministries to enable them to better serve the Kingdom. He currently works for SourcePointe, an HR Outsourcing Agency while continuing to own and operate Christian Management Consulting as a ministry. In his free time, he also writes a lot on Church Development as a Church Consultant.

As a husband and father of three, Trent Cotton has a passion surrounding the role Christian Men are to play in their families, communities, churches and businesses.  This particular blog is dedicated to helping men take back the role that we have lost in society.

Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.
Philippians 4:4-7 NKJV

Is it just me or should someone have shared this verse with Chicken Little?  Poor guy!  He was simply trying to warn everyone of an impending doom right?  He should have to suffer from all of the ridicule and pain shouldn’t he?

You know, I think part of a child’s DNA is composed of anxiety.  Granted, all of them show it differently, but they all have it.  Whether they are anxious about their grades, friends, audition, or in our household, the daily schedule, anxiety commands a lot of our children’s thought processes.  I do not believe I would be going too far on a limb to say that most of us never grow out of it.

So how do you use the movie Chicken Little to discuss Phil 4 and anxiety?  There are a couple of key lessons to highlight with your child as you watch the movie:

1.  Anxiety is like a cold, it spreads quickly. Notice how the entire town goes absolutely crazy when Chicken Little’s first episode occurs.  It becomes a pandemic very quickly.  A recent example of anxiety spreading over something that may or may not have been something terribly concerning would be that of the swine flu.  It seemed like in only a few short hours, the world was going to be taken to its knees by this new virus.  Only three weeks later, I see very little about this all-powerful flu… so would that be 2009’s “The Sky is Falling!”  Anxiety spreads and makes things worse, Phil 4 tells us not to be anxious!

2. The Bible teaches us to hold fast to Christ, He gives us the ability to be anxious for nothing, for He is our Shepherd. Spend some time explaining to your child the role and characteristics of a plain ole shepherd and then help them understand how Christ is the Good Shepherd.  He said, “my sheep know my voice.”

3.  Our anxieties are funny to God. One of the things I love about this movie is how it accurately portrays false anxiety.  We can usually run around like a chicken with our head cut off when really, we should spend time resting in the promise that Christ will never forsake us.  Help your children understand that to Christ, our anxieties are sometimes if not most of the time crippling to our faith.  Faith is the ability to let go of our anxieties and cling more to the hope and promise we have in Christ’s sovereignty.

Sure, we all have anxieties and some would say they are inevitable and inescapable, but Christ told us to “cast our cares upon him.”   Part of being a dad, uncle, older brother or whatever type of leader you are, is having the ability to teach children to trust in Christ alone.  If you’re like me, maybe if you say it enough to them, you will start to remind yourself of this solid, yet simple truth.

If you would like more in this series, please be sure to check out the other articles in Using Movies to Witness.

About the Writer:

Trent Cotton has spent a number of years in management and business consulting. After spending some time in the field, he joined the HR department, beginning in recruiting and eventually serving as the Department Head of HR for one of the major lines of business. With such a varied background, he works to bring all of these together to help churches and other Christian organizations incorporate some common business practices into their ministries to enable them to better serve the Kingdom. He currently works for SourcePointe, an HR Outsourcing Agency while continuing to own and operate Christian Management Consulting as a ministry. In his free time, he also writes a lot on Church Development as a Church Consultant.

As a husband and father of three, Trent Cotton has a passion surrounding the role Christian Men are to play in their families, communities, churches and businesses.  This particular blog is dedicated to helping men take back the role that we have lost in society.

“All kinds of animals, birds, reptiles and creatures of the sea are being tamed and have been tamed by man, but no man can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison.”

James 3:7-8 NIV

I’ve been spending a lot of time recently studying communication from a biblical perspective. I’m doing this because of a series of teachings I’m putting together for godly marital communication. The whole study has been extremely challenging as I’m constantly feeling the weight of guilt for my own poor communication issues and blatant misuse of the tongue God’s given me.

I’m not finished with the study, but really want to encourage all of our regular readers to take the time to study it for themselves. I’ve found an incredible peace from the lessons I’ve learned so far. I’m speaking less and am really growing as a result of the words within scripture about the tongue.  The changes are helping in so many ways.

I’m not at all saying that I’ve perfected the tongue, but am thankful to see God changing my heart and giving me the wisdom to simply shut up. It’s been a long process, but a very needed one as well. I encourage you to dig into scripture about the tongue. Read, meditate, and change. Trust me when I say, it will change your marriage.

If you need a starting point, here are some great places to get started:

• James 3:1-12
• Matthew 12:33-37
• Proverbs 12:13-16
• Psalm 5:8-9
• …and most of the Proverbs

Also, here are links to all of our Talk With Your Spouse Tips:

• Talk With Your Spouse Tip #1
• Talk With Your Spouse Tip #2
• Talk With Your Spouse Tip #3
• Talk With Your Spouse Tip #4
• Talk With Your Spouse Tip #5
• Talk With Your Spouse Tip #6
• Talk With Your Spouse Tip #7
• Talk With Your Spouse Tip #8
• Talk With Your Spouse Tip #9
• Talk With Your Spouse Tip #10
• Talk With Your Spouse Tip #11
• Talk With Your Spouse Tip #12
• Talk With Your Spouse Tip #13
• Talk With Your Spouse Tip #14
• Talk With Your Spouse Tip #15